About the Author
Carl Gincley was born in Perth Amboy, New Jersey, U.S. He grew up in Denville, the hub of Morris County. His career was in RF and microwave electronics manufacturing. While working in Anghel Labs, Inc, Carl was the production planner responsible for securing materials for a sole source critical microwave component used in the guidance system of the latest generation defensive Patriot Missile. Its first real-world use was in Operation Desert Storm in 1991. His spouse of 31 years is an Episcopal priest, Rev. Peter De Franco. Carl has participated in all facets of Episcopal Church life including worship & liturgical duties and fundraising. He was a volunteer for over 10 years and then became a member of the Executive Board of Directors of St. Peter’s Haven, Homeless Shelter and Food Pantry, in Clifton, NJ. Carl and his husband are both retired and live in Toms River, N.J. with their 2 cats. Carl's heritage is British and his interests are writing children's stories and songwriting.
"Carl's current initiative explores ways to expand our understanding of remembrance, framing 'Remembrance-Gratitude' as a shared bond we fundamentally hold in common. In his effort to rethink how we honor the past, he introduces a new visual concept—'Love can build a bridge of memory'—and a moving metaphor for Memorial Day and Remembrance Day: 'Love's Loudest Whisper.'"
A New Language of Heartfelt Reverence
The essence of Remembrance-Gratitude is not a passive feeling; it is a living, breathing connection. If we are to stand together across borders, united by a common heartbeat, we must also choose to speak to one another with a renewed kindness.
To bring this collective reverence into our daily lives, I invite you to reclaim a beautiful, forgotten gesture: the verbal caress.
In our modern world, we often rush through our connections, signing off with sterile words or hurried phrases. But a caress of kindness—spoken in a message or penned in a letter—is a deliberate pause. It is a gentle, thoughtful touch, a soft breeze of support sent to a friend or loved one simply to say, “I value your soul, and I am sending you goodwill.”
When we tell a friend, "I am sending a gentle caress to your heart today," we are breaking the monotony of the everyday. We are choosing a language of profound recognition.
Let us not only remember together under the blanket of gratitude; let us find new connections with one another along the way.
Beyond Words: The Caress of Kindness
Sometimes the heart wants to speak when a room is too loud, the distance is too great, or words simply fail us. A Caress of Kindness is a silent, physical gesture designed to flash a beacon of warmth and support across a room, a crowded street, or a video call.
1. What It Is
Inspired by the universal two-handed heart, this gentle movement serves as a living, silent connection. It is a tool to remind someone that they are not alone, to confirm a bond of affection, or to quietly send a ripple of love and support when someone needs it most: “You are dear to me,” or, “I’ve got your back!” It is also a quick signal to a group: “I’m your friend and we stand united!”
2. How to Do It
· Catch their eye: Make gentle eye contact with the person across the room or on your screen.
· The motion: Softly curl your fingers and brush them gently down your own cheek.
· The intention: Hold their gaze for a brief moment to signal: "I see and value you. I am sending you my heart’s friendship and goodwill. I am here for you.”
3. What the Recipient Experiences
When a friend receives it, they feel:
· Deeply Seen: They are instantly acknowledged as a valued human being.
· Emotionally Anchored: If they are anxious or feel overwhelmed, the gesture helps melt away tension.
· Grounded and Cherished: It breaks through emotional walls, dissolves loneliness, and reminds them that they are worthy of gentleness, love, and care.
It takes just a single moment to perform, but its message can lift someone up and change the world's heartbeat—one silent, loving gesture at a time.
